Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Movie Review #54 Dracula: The Dark Prince (2013)

- Bit(e) of love

I just caught Dracula: The Dark Prince (2013) and was spurred to imagination of a review for it, so here I am typing up a storm at 6:00AM. I'm not sure what it is about Vampire movies, I just have to watch them. There hasn't been a good vampire movie in my books in a very long time. I know who to blame, but I think that might get me off topic too much so I'll jot that down for another time.

With that, the movie. Dracula: The Dark Prince is about love. Which is fine, especially if you're dealing with Dracula. His mythos has always involved love in some way, he usually became the vampire Dracula after losing his love. I don't think love is bad I'm not that empty inside, and certainly not with the confines of Dracula and/or vampires. No here the problem with the script and who they write a flimsy suggestion of what is love(oh baby, don't hurt me) and the actors are left acting a movie that has its feelings all messed up and some sequences that stick out like a sore thumb I'm afraid.

First and foremost our leading lady Alina and her sister Esme (played by Kelly Wenham and Holly Earl respectively) should be at least decent warriors, they are after all guarding and transporting an ancient relic. They are however shown as flimsy klutz in their first encounter by the horrible lead Lucian (played by Ben Robson). Some strong female leads or at least Alina would have helped this movie along. I also understand the unlikely hero turn golden hero is a sellable storyline, but Lucian is a disgusting man who forces a kiss from our leading lady, never takes her seriously and is a shallow man, even after it's clear that yes he is indeed the hero of the movie. Van Helsing (played by Jon Voight) teaches him the way of a true demon slayer in a poor montage but it's all in vain. He goes through the actions but no personal growth happens and it reflects poorly on just about everything.

Jon Voight with a very manly mustache my readers.
Dracula (played by Luke Roberts) is the highlight of the movie, no so much his acting (though it is probably the best in the movie), but his story is tweaked a bit from the norm and I did enjoy that aspect. He is suppose to be a monster but you never* really see that side. He may pull some puppet strings of evil. But he really just doesn't want anyone to die unjustly anymore as his wife did. He just needs that little artifact lightbringer and he might have a headstrong warrior who might kill some people to do it... yeah ok Dracula is sorta evil. But he means well, which is more than I can say for Lucian. The little twist was nice, I just wish the movie wasn't marred with Alina being unsure between Lucian and Dracula, the entire substory with Andros (played by RichardAston) being complete filler; though his axe was awesome looking and would love to own one just like it. Finally the nudity was really just unnecessary, especially the first scene with it. You're just going about your business and your screen is covered with a surprise tit. “Grow up” you exclaim! “What is wrong with it?” you say. Nothing is wrong with it. But why show it? Sex sells and you tried to make the movie sell to the horny teenager market, that's all. It doesn't add enough to the story to be needed and feels like a cheap tack-on.

Surely you jest blogger.
Vampires make my heart skip. I've watched a lot of vampire movies. Not all the greats I'm sure (suggest me some, maybe I'll review it!), but I've certainly watched my share of sludge. It's such a sloppy script with a lot of unnecessary scenes that ruin the flow of the movie. I really think that the story could have been crafted into a keeper and not wasted Jon Voight's talents this could be more than a cheap bargain movie to pass the time.

I give it 3/10


PS: * I lied.

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