- Vamps, wolves, children,
oh my!
I'll start this review by
saying that I have seen all of the previous movies of the Twilight
saga, and that most of them were by my account atrocious, skimming
the bottom of barrel of bad movies. The earlier ones contain some of
the worst acting and after seeing other movies that contain the
perpetrators I can more easily blame directors and writing on their
bad performances which may help me appreciate the actors in other
roles but it won't help at all in this series. Fight sequences if
you can call them are pretty poorly designed in previous movies along
with a slew of other problems, some of them were figured out and
fixed and others are a mainstay of the series. I'll discuss all of
it down yonder.
With The Twilight Saga:
Breaking Dawn Part 2 we see the fifth movie in as many years and the
series hit its highest climax. The Illuminati of vampires, the
Volturi are moving against the Cullens and some completely
surprising, unmentioned till now friends of theirs are introduced,
including some atrocious stereotypes. The viewer should just groan
and move forward – there are so many other problems to fixate on!
The movie starts just a
couple of days after what happened in the previous movie and we're
“treated” to Edward (played by Robert Pattinson) whispering sweet
nothings to his new-ish bride and even newer mommy Bella (played by
Kristen Stewart). There is a chuckle provided when she almost
crushed him with a hug with her newfound vampire strength. A little
bit of me wished it happened. They have a brief discussion about her
powers; it seems she is the strongest, has incredible will-power (she
just doesn’t want human blood) and has the ability to shield others
from harm. All incredible story breakers and too convenient if you
ask me. The creepy factor is upped here shortly after introducing
Bella’s half-human, half-vampire daughter (usually known as a
Dhampir but not so in this movie). You see in Stephenie Meyer’s
twilight series werewolves imprint on people. They are sorta mates
for life after they imprint. Yeah that’s right. Jacob (played by
Taylor Lautner) has imprinted on the one day old Renesmee (played by ten different actresses), but don’t
worry, this half breed ages incredibly fast so in 7 years she’ll
totally be fully grown and sorta almost legal.
All joking aside it’s
incredibly weird but with the confines of the story it does actually
make sense and it isn’t actually done in any gross way, mostly
because it’s not really brought up again. Jacob never makes any
advances, he is, in fact, absolutely more of a father figure for the
child than her own father Edward, so I’ll give them that. The
large fight sequence near the end looks like an average hero team
all-out fight, similar to say X-Men: Last Stand. However most of the
vampires never use their powers in the fight and it falls rather flat
as far as big action sequences go. Not to mention and this is by far
the most spoilerish thing, the entire action sequence actually never
happened within the story due to it being in Alice’s (played by Ashley Greene) precognitive mind. I really can’t stand
these plot devices used. It’s a waste, especially in this case as
I think they had decent stances on character death and the importance
even with almost immortals that life is something to be cherished but
it was all wasted with the “Disney” ending.
 |
| You mad bro? |
It has its funny moments
and visually it’s alright though they miss multiple times where
vampires should sparkle and do not. The movie moves at a fast pace
which is good and bad. You never have time to be bored but I feel a
lot of things are left unexplained like who has what power, and some
characters have no description other than an occupation or hobby and
in at least one case, their stereotype. I feel as if fans of the
series just want to see a whimsical, poorly acted and an even worse
written love story and if that’s OK with you, by all means watch
and enjoy this movie because when it comes right down to it, that is
all this is. It’s big budget fare in a similar fashion to the
Michael Bay Transformers series. Just replace all those explosions
with worse writing about how much two eighteen years old kids can
totally *get* one another.
I give it a 3/10
PS: I don't care who you
are, you're going to laugh when Jane (played by Dakota Fanning)
throws a small child into the fire.
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